Screw a WISH up for all your Sisters!!!

Wish granted! You have the perfect area rug to fit your decor. The style, pattern, and size fits everything to your heart's desire. Unfortunately, the day after you get the perfect rug, your dog yaks all over it, and you can't get the stain or smell out no matter what you do. There are no duplicates of that perfect rug available to purchase anywhere in the world, so you can't replace it.

I wish I had a gigantic box of crayons that fits perfectly on a shelf in my back room, is not too heavy to pick up or too bulky to carry through the house easily, that has unbreakable crayons that can't have the paper peeled off of them, won't color on anything but coloring book paper and blank notebook paper, can never get lost, can't be eaten by children, last forever, and have multiples of every color so the kids won't fight over them anymore.

Thought I might throw a challenging one in here. Seems like all of my other ones have been too easy.

WISH GRANTED....but now your children's minds are controlled by crayolaians from crayolathon. Everytime they pick up a crayon it makes them turned into space aliens and they control your mind with the power of the crayon. You and your husband are now zombies and do everything the children tell you to do. You are both taken into custody by cps and you never see your children again because they have been beam up to the planet with the crayons so the secret can not be discovered.

I wish all kids could grow up with loving parents....

Wish granted!


You quit smoking....that simple, but you gained 20 lbs & pulled all your hair out



I wish my hubby wouldn't be such a whinny baby when he feels bad!

Wish granted....

but now he hooks up with my whiny baby and they listen to each other and fall out of love with usl

I wish my husband's ex wife would be vaporized.....

WISH GRANTED....
But soon after a strange teenager shows up at your door claiming to be the illegitimate son of your hubby and his ex, and because his mom is gone you must look after him, within hours you find out he is the most hateful,mean,laziest teenager EVER. He wants you to wait on him hand and foot, he calls you names and *Gasp* he breaks your crayons. So you kick him out and throw his belongings in the garbage after you douse all his clothes and take gardening shears to them. Then he calls Child protective Services on you (because after he broke your Outrageous Orange you snapped and beat him senseless) as the police cart you away you cry "but he broke my crayons" and they tell you,"there are NO crayons where you're going"! (sorry)

I wish Aiden was potty trained already!!

man that did screw it up...no crayons.... And I would beat the crap out of someone over my outrageous orange.....

Wish Granted!

Aiden is potty trained in a flash, then wait.......next week he is checking the mail, then washing clothes....HOLY shit HE IS DRIVING THE DURANGO!!! Aiden, come back you say........He waves out the window and says Gee MA, I thought you wanted me to grow up





I wish I could take a real vacation! (U know, 7 days in paradise)

Wish Granted!!

You take a wonderful Bahama vacation, unfortunately it's hurricane season and you are right in the middle of a horrible tropical hurricane. Staying inside would be ok since I'm sure you can find "something" to do indoors hehe but your hotel is flooding and you are stuck in the upstairs conference rooms with 50 whiney and hysterical people and only have sleeping bags and Top Ramen to eat. After 2 days you are so stir crazy you never want another vacation again!! Sorry love.

I wish my husband understood what an apology was.

Wish Granted.

He now understands what it is from the 20 year old blonde bimbo he just knocked up.....

I wish I had a dollar for every worry mom's worry about to give back to them .....

WIS GRANTED!
You are now the richest person on the planet!! But you spend Billions of dollars on Crayons and create Crayolathon, but you realize some of the population does not understand the meaning of "Share the Crayons" So you have them beheaded and they come back to haunt you and steal your crayons and hide them!! (Trying to get creative,but lack of sleep has me borderline-delirious)

I wish Tony would STFU and just do what I tell him and not hassle me!!!!

wait I think I read your wish wrong.....oh well Im not changing my response. DEAL with it. LOL

wish granted.....

tony drank some hot coffee and burnt his mouth so bad he can never talk again so when he tried to tell you the brakes went out in the car ooohhhh no you couldnt understand his sign language.....


I WISH I DIDNT HAVE TO WORK!!!!!!!!!

WISH GRANTED....

YOU NO LONGER HAVE TO WORK BECAUSE OF A HORRIBLE ACCIDENT THAT HAS LEFT YOU WITH a lump sum settelment of one million dollars but all you can do is lay in bed and move your eyes.

i wish i was married to a comedian......

WISH GRANTED!!!
You are now married to a comedian, unfortunately you realize that your personal life is fair game in his stand up routine, so when he jokes to a crowd of 200 ppl that you commonly fart in your sleep and you hear about it you are mortified (not to mention you can NEVER actually have a serious conversation with the guy) and make him sleep on the couch for 2 years, he then makes jokes about how he has to sleep on the couch but at least he doesn't have to listen to you snore like a grizzly. You then begin taking anti-depressants and anxiety pills and become a hermit because you have no Idea what else he has told the world about you!!!


I wish I had a cure-all cream for anything that might happen to my kids!!

WISH GRANTED

Now we have a cream that cures all....but then after five years they develop an immunity to it and it no longer works. You now have become so used to just putting a cream on them you do not know how to handle anything without it. You beat your head against a wall till your neighbor calls 911 and they take you away with you screaming. Your kids are now raised without you and can not quit crying for their mom They end up not knowing how to deal with anything... wondering around rubbing cream on themselves and being observed by strangers for their behavior in a place that has no windows or crayons.


I wish my husband did not think it was cool his brother 62 has a 23 year old girlfriend.